{"product_id":"if-my-thoughts-were-loud-i-d-be-fired","title":"If My Thoughts Were Loud, I’d Be Fired: The Polite Things I Said Out Loud and the Unemployment I Avoided by Keeping the Rest Inside","description":"\u003cp style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0810\/8733\/2575\/files\/blog_image.png?v=1780504212\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch1\u003eIf My Thoughts Were Loud, I'd Be Fired\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eThe Polite Things I Said Out Loud and the Unemployment I Avoided by Keeping the Rest Inside\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHave you ever smiled politely while your brain was filing a complaint with Human Resources?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHave you ever listened to someone explain something completely ridiculous and thought:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\"Bless your heart.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhile your actual thoughts were applying for witness protection?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThen friend...\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWelcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis book is for the people who somehow manage to function in society despite carrying around enough unspoken commentary to power a small city.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe people who bite their tongue so often they're surprised they still have one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe people who nod during meetings, family gatherings, customer interactions, grocery store encounters, and random conversations with strangers while their internal narrator is absolutely fighting for its life.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf My Thoughts Were Loud, I'd Be Fired is a hilarious collection of real-life observations, everyday absurdities, customer service moments, people-watching adventures, and the countless situations that tested my patience, my self-control, and occasionally my will to remain employed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eInside you'll find:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e✔ Laugh-out-loud stories about everyday life\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e✔ Relatable humor for exhausted adults\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e✔ Funny observations about work, people, and society\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e✔ Customer service survival moments\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e✔ Stories that will make you snort coffee through your nose\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e✔ The exact reason some thoughts should remain inside our heads\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut underneath all the laughter is something a little deeper.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBecause if you're reading this, chances are you're tired.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTired of pretending you've got it all together.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTired of being the responsible one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTired of smiling when what you really want to do is stare at someone and ask, \"Now what exactly made you think that was a good idea?\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis book sees you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe overthinkers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe people-pleasers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe exhausted workers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe parents.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe caregivers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe customer service veterans.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe folks who have survived another day without saying what they were actually thinking.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou are among friends here.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWritten in Mama T's signature style of heart, humor, and \"I can't believe somebody actually said that,\" these stories will have you laughing so hard you'll scare the dog, wake the baby, or accidentally explain the joke to your spouse three times.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd somewhere between the laughter and the ridiculousness, you'll realize something important:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou're not the only one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWe've all got thoughts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSome of us are just smart enough not to say them out loud.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eWhat You'll Receive\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ A hilarious digital 54 page ebook packed with laugh-out-loud stories\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ Relatable humor for anyone surviving adulthood\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ Funny workplace moments, people-watching adventures, and real-life observations\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ Mama T storytelling that feels like sitting on the porch with your funniest friend\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ Instant access after purchase\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ 60 pages of humor, heart, and \"I thought I was the only one\" moments\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eImportant Information\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ DIGITAL DOWNLOAD ONLY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ No physical product will be shipped\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ Available immediately after purchase\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ Read on your phone, tablet, computer, or e-reader\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSo grab your coffee, hide from your responsibilities for a little while, and enjoy a book that proves you're not losing your mind.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou're just surrounded by material.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Rustic Roots Pantry","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":49971527647455,"sku":null,"price":10.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0810\/8733\/2575\/files\/ebookcover1896x1152px.png?v=1780503919","url":"https:\/\/rusticrootspantry.com\/products\/if-my-thoughts-were-loud-i-d-be-fired","provider":"Rustic Roots Pantry","version":"1.0","type":"link"}